'My sister-in-law has destroyed my marriage' (2)

‘My sister-in-law has destroyed my marriage’( 2)

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We conclude Philomena and Thomas’ intriguing story which started last week.

When Thomas lost his job, life became difficult for him and his wife. The situation improved when Philomena started a petty trading business. But the couple lived for five years without a child. No sooner had Charity her sister-in-law come to live with them than their marriage became unstable.

“I had no problem with my husband. He never worried me for not giving him a child because he saw that I was desperate to have at least one. I was prayerful about it and I wasn't taking my gynaecological appointments and medications for granted. My husband’s attention was centred on getting a new job so that he would fend for his family. But when his elder sister came to live with us with her two sons, she did not give us notice because her husband drove her out. She insulted the man, according to the story I heard, and when he couldn't endure it any longer, he threw her out. Having come with her two sons, I had no option but to vacate my belongings from my room to the master’s bedroom. She and her children occupied two rooms. I welcomed that idea  because I had no child,” she said.

But after a while, Philomena’s patience snapped.

“My sister-in-law started cooking for my husband. She rearranged my kitchen without my permission, parked my pots into one big carton and dumped it in my store. When I asked why, she retorted that I should be ashamed of cooking my husband’s meals with such outdated pots. I kept my cool, though I was hurt. The last straw that broke the camel’s back was when I hurried home from the place I  sell foodstuff to prepare dinner for my husband, and he was bold to tell me that I shouldn't bother giving him dinner any longer because his sister had promised to be doing that. What added salt to my injury was when his sister sauntered out of the room and asked me how much I was making from my petty trading business that I couldn't sit down and see if I could give her brother a child. She said it with a measure of disdain. I flared up and gave her a piece of my mind. Sadly, my husband sided with her, and I was beaten up. Thomas had never raised a finger at me until his sister came to live with us. Worse of all, she didn't stop her brother from hitting me. She watched me being battered by my husband. When her first son tried to stop my husband, his mother pushed him aside and warned him never to go close to where a husband and wife were settling their problem. Later that night, he started begging me to forgive him in a hush manner. He didn’t want his sister to hear that he was begging me,” Philomena recalled.

 Charity became very autocratic in “my matrimonial home because she was the one feeding my husband.  He no longer had a say in his own house. When I reminded him that he was behaving like his sister’s toy, he warned me sternly, reminding me that he had to respect his elder sister. A visitor visiting us for the first time would go home with the impression that the house belonged to my sister-in-law. When the landlord’s lawyer came for the house rent, my sister-in-law would be the one to see the man and plead to be given sometime to offset the debt. Indeed, the lawyer thought she was the one that rented the three-bedroom flat. I was now tip-toeing in my house like a stranger. I hardly cooked in my kitchen except on Sundays when I would be at home throughout after church service. What surprised me was how my husband would change at the sight of his sister. He even stopped going to the church we had been attending together for five years for his elder sister’s white garment church. She is a renowned prophetess in that church and, according to her, my husband would not be able to make me pregnant until he starts following her to her church and become a member and perhaps go for spiritual cleansing. That was what he did and he insisted I should join him. I obeyed for peace sake but I was not happy. When my sister-in-law said I ought to be given a spiritual bathe so that evil forces hindering me from giving birth would let me be, I reacted. I would never go to any river for spiritual cleansing. I’m not possessed by any evil spirit. If my husband wants to drive me away because of that, I would go home peacefully. I still sneaked out to attend my former church on week days, but I go the white garment only on Sundays,” she stressed.

Philomena said she now has a plan B.

“I called my elder brother who lives and works in America for financial help and he promised sending some money to me. He was the one who sent money with which my husband used to beg the landlord to give us some more months before my sister-in-law moved in. When I told him what I was going through, he said he would send some money to me. He told me to leave that house and get a new apartment, pay and move in and leave him with his r sister. If he wants to join me, my doors are open to him alone. If not, I’m okay staying on my own. I will still remain his wife but perchance his sister insists on moving into my house, I would not allow that.

That is what I have made up my mind to do. I have got an apartment, soon, I would have the money to pay. I didn't disclose this to my husband because he would discourage me. My fear now is that her sister may tell him not to marry me again. She said something about getting another lady from her church for her brother to bail me out of this childless situation. She laughed while saying it.  That sounded like a warning to me. That is the only fear I have now. What if I move out and my sister-in-law gets somebody to be keeping my husband company? The man now behaves like a zombie,” Philomena wondered.

·      Readers, what’s your advice for Philomena?